Are Chinese bathrooms dirty? Yes! But Chinese people have clean hands.

There is a difference in the cultural ideas of cleanliness here.

In the west, we like to have clean restroom facilities because they look nice enough to touch and diminish the fear of festering bacteria. We also have the social responsibility to wash our hands with the facility provided soap and running water or use our convenient little hand sanitizer bottles.

In China, it’s hard to find those little hand sanitizer bottles (really, for some reason there are plenty of large bottles but few little ones) and many restrooms don’t have soap or even running water. There is also the idea that putting your hands under cold water when it is cold out will get you sick (this is actually proved to be correct, but it spreads germs and gets everyone else sick) so there isn’t much emphasis on handwasing. This means that clean is then a matter of keeping your hands clean, not coming into contact with anything at all. Again, guys have it easy here. Girls however have stalls with stall doors and have to flush.

So have you ever seen those old women who, without any modesty, leave the door hanging wide open while doing something rather private then precede to not flush? Sure it seems close to vile in western culture but look at from a cleanliness perspective – she didn’t touch the door handle or the toilet handle. She thinks it’s disgusting when us westerns not only close the door but grab hold of the handle and fasten the lock, then precede to touch the toilet handle, that has been touched by countless people who have just touched some not so clean places, to flush the toilet.

So Many bathrooms in China are outright disgusting, but if you don’t touch anything they are clean as can be.

Should you sit down on a public toilet? It’s probably not a good idea.

Remember that whole idea of not touching anything in the bathroom? That includes the toilet seat. Many Chinese people think public western toilets are disgusting – just think about how many butts have touched it before yours! It’s honestly not the butts you should worry about but the feet. Since many Chinese people think western toilets are dirty, they will proceed to climb onto the seat and squat just like using a regular Chinese toilet. You’ve never wondered why the toilet seats are so scuffed up? Trust me, those shoes aren’t clean.

Those who aren’t climbers are often hoverers and while this is a good clean method, it often misses the mark. My advice is honestly to use a Chinese toilet or bring sani-wipes for the seat.

Are there any nice bathrooms? Sure, there are more and more nice bathrooms everyday

If you are ever out and about, go to any KFC or McDonald’s. Generally, any foreign owned franchise will employ western sanitation techniques and many higher end Chinese establishments are pretty good about it as well.

How bad are the squatters? Not that bad, but they have their drawbacks.

I have tons of western friends who love them and prefer them to western toilets – these friends are all men.

The thing that no one tells you about women and squatters is that… there can be splash back. No one wants to admit that it happens, but I’ve heard many embarrassed confessions. There was even this one joke about not kissing dirty ankles.

Sometimes there is no splash guard, or you squat too far forward or not center enough and so you miss. I’m sure you personally never do, and I sure don’t, but someone does because there are often little puddles on the foot areas next to or in front of the squatters.

It doesn’t matter though, it’s only the bottoms of your shoes that get dirty right? Well, pant legs and long skirts sometimes come down a bit more than expected when you squat. You might notice women rolling up their pant legs while waiting in line, do what the locals do. Also, don’t wear those foam flip-flops or cloth-covered shoes to the Chinese WC.

Do you have to undress to use a squatter? No.

You’d be surprised how many people try to take their pants off, or at least one pant leg off, to use the squatters. It explains some of the long waits in the women’s room. It’s not necessary – you’ll figure it out. If you are really worried, just wear skirts.

So it’s just squatters and dirty western toilets, right? Yes, if you stay within the major cities.

If you ever leave a major city, just hold it until you go back.

So the variety of restroom facilities really varies by region in China and goes by many different terms.   They also vary in different degrees of laowai-friendliness.

Some are really decent outhouses that are actually better than the porter potties at American county fairs and construction sites.

Some are really just big holes in the ground with one wall to give the illusion of privacy. With a nice country breeze and plenty of room, these can actually better than some bathrooms in the cities.  In some areas, these holes or pits are called feikong – waste holes.

I think the Darwin award should go to whomever decided to build a windowless brick outhouse in the middle of the Inner Mongolian desert. I suppose it probably does withstand the sand and wind better than any other structure, but ever heard of a brick oven? I think it’s actually one the levels of Hell to be locked in a small room full of other people’s baking feces.

For the really bad bathrooms, just put some of those scented tissues over your nose and be fast!

What about 男/女 restrooms? The problem with many bathrooms that don’t separate men and women is honestly the locks…

Remember the thing about touching the locks? Men often don’t lock the doors either. It’s scary walking in on a drunk man with a cigarette in his mouth who smiles as he lets you enjoy the view. It’s even worse when you are using the facilities with a broken lock and a man walks in on you and takes way too long to turn around and close the door. There are many doors that don’t close right or don’t lock so have someone guard the door for you. It’s just embarrassing.

Why are there urinals in the women’s bathroom?

I’ve come across this a couple of times and had to do a double take to make sure I went through the right door.  Yes, there are sometimes male urinals in the women’s bathrooms in China.  I’ve asked around and they are for women who have to take their sons to the bathroom.  I guess it makes sense.

Are children toilet trained? Sure.

Many 3-5 year-olds still pee right on the floor. Well, if you don’t want to endure the Chinese bathrooms, why put innocent children through it?

This actually puzzled me for the longest time. Finally I got around to asking about this. One reason is that children, apparently, shouldn’t have to hold it if there isn’t a bathroom readily available, that’s actually what that bucket is for on buses (or at least I’ve most commonly seen it used as such). Reason two is that children can fall in or fall down and touch something and then they need a bath. See, Chinese people are actually very cleanliness conscious, it just looks like using a public floor for relief is unclean to foreign bystanders.

Can children really fall in? Maybe.

It really depends on the toilet. Remember how some women miss? Well, sometimes those floors are really slick and I’ve almost fallen down a couple times myself. Remember those waste holes? Sometimes the pits are actually quite large and you have to balance yourself on a corner. I could imagine a small child falling in and then needing help to get out… In general, I think the children are big enough to use a public restroom without falling in.

Should you eat the pork? That’s really a personal choice.

If you are ever out in the country, you may or may not want to use the facilities before dinner. You see, some people don’t want to clean the outhouse, it’s dirty. So sometimes people connect the outhouses to the pig pens so they can kill two birds with one stone – don’t have to clean the outhouse and not have to feed the pigs. It is really disturbing seeing how excited the pigs get when they see you walking up to the outhouse…

There are many times in China and when I envied men, they have it easy when it comes to bathrooms.  Often men don’t even bother using the facilities, especially if the restroom is dirty, far away, or occupied.  I blame men for stinking up the streets and that one area in the park!

“Hockey is not a sport in Canada – it’s a cult. It’s a religion”

- Brian Burke, General Manager of The Toronto Maple Leafs and the 2010 United States Olympic Team

One of the most vivid memories I have is watching a hockey game on TV.  I remember exactly where I sat, I remember the emotions I felt, I remember what I was eating, I remember what I was drinking, I remember the smell of the room I sat in.

Sad?  Maybe.  But not to me.  This was back in 2002, when Canada won the Gold Medal in Salt Lake City.  Earlier in the week, the same thing happened, but I was in a very, very different place.  Instead of being in a room with a bunch of my friends in the afternoon, I woke up at 4am on March 1 (February 28 in Canada) and I watched the game alone. It was one of the strangest experiences I’ve had as an expat, and left me feeling more alone than ever.

February 24, 2002: A heavily favoured Team Canada is set to go up against a Cinderella US Team cast as too old from the start of the tournament, but surprised everyone by going undefeated up to the final.

I sat in the lounge of my University residence building with some of my friends in the early afternoon. I could hear people get excited on the floor above me and below me.. It was going to be a moment for the ages.

March 1, 2010: A heavily favoured Team Canada is set to go up against a Cinderella US Team cast as too young from the start of the tournament, but surprised everyone by going undefeated up to the final.

I sat in the living room of my girlfriend’s alone in the very early morning. I could hear nobody around me so I quietly made my breakfast. It was going to be a moment for the ages.

...it's on! by scazon

February 24, 2002: I turn on CBC and hear the legendary voices of Bob Cole and Harry Neal start the game. I watched in anticipation as the game started. I couldn’t contain my enthusiasm. I screamed with friends and started messaging my friends back home over every little thing.

March 1, 2010: I turn on CCTV-5 and hear the Chinese commentary start the game. I watched in anticipation as the game started. I couldn’t contain my enthusiasm. I kept quiet alone and started messaging my friends back home over every little thing.

February 24, 2002: The puck dropped. Canada was trying to win Gold for the first time in over 50 years. It was over two of my lifetimes. We had come so close in recent years; I knew we could do it this time.

March 1, 2010: The puck dropped. Canada was trying to win Gold for the first time in 8 years. It felt like two lifetimes ago. We had come so close in recent years; I knew we could do it this time.

February 24, 2002: The action goes back and forth, the rhythms of my heart match. With 20 minutes left of play, Canada leads by 1 goal. I set my ICQ Away Message to “20 minutes to glory”.

March 1, 2010: The action goes back and forth, the rhythms of my heart match. With 20 minutes left of play, Canada leads by 1 goal. I set my Twitter status to “20 minutes to glory”.

February 24, 2002: I can’t contain my energy, screaming at every little thing.

March 1, 2010: I start to crash and make another cup of coffee, as quietly as possible.

February 24, 2002: Late in the game, with Canada leading by one, 24 year old Jarome Iginla breaks in all alone. He shoots, he scores!!! Canada lets out a collective scream of joy!

Sidney Crosby, the hero of this tale (courtesy of Wikimedia)

March 1, 2010: Late in the game, with Canada leading by one, 22 year old Sidney Crosby breaks in all alone. He shoots, and fails to score!!! Canada lets out a collective sigh.

February 24, 2002: In the dying moments, Canada scores another goal making the score 5-2. Supposedly Bob Cole makes his legendary call “Now after 50 years, it’s time for Canada to stand up and cheer. Stand up and cheer everybody! The Olympics Salt Lake City 2002, men’s ice hockey, gold medal: Canada!” but I’m too excited to hear it.

As the time runs out I message several of my friends about how great of a moment it is.

March 1, 2010: In the dying moments, the United States scores a goal making the score 2-2. The Chinese commentator goes crazy with excitement, but I don’t understand a word.

As the time runs out I message my sister and say “I feel dead inside”. She responds “Me too”.

February 24, 2002: The Canadian players rush the ice. Gold medals are awarded, “Oh, Canada!” is sang.

March 1, 2010: My phone rings: one of my fellow Canadians in China calling in udder shock. We both say that we may be late for work.

February 24, 2002: I am overcome with joy. We did it Canada! I experience patriotism that I never thought possible.

March 1, 2010: Overtime starts. I am overcome with worry. Can we do it Canada? I experience anxiety that I never thought possible.

February 24, 2002: I call my family to celebrate. I go and see some other friends to celebrate. I celebrate with all of Canada as the moment sinks in.

March 1, 2010: I watch in agony as seven of the longest overtime minutes go by and I dread the two words that I hoped I would never say again: “Shoot out” or “Silver Medal”.

February 24, 2002: I can only say two words “Gold Medal”.

March 1, 2010: 32 year old Jarome Iginla passes to Sidney Crosby. Crosby scores.

I do something that I had avoided doing for hours: I cheered. So did 35 million of my countrymen.

I am overcome with joy. We did it Canada! I experience patriotism that I never thought possible. I call my family to celebrate. I go and see some other friends to celebrate. I celebrate with all of Canada as the moment sinks in. I look at the time. I realize how little I have left and run to get my clothes for work. I change in the living room while the medals are being presented.

I cry as the flags are raised, and I quietly sing “Oh Canada!” with the 20, 000 people in attendance. I cry out of joy for the moment. I cry because I’m not there to experience it.

February 24, 2002: We celebrate together.

March 1, 2010: They celebrate together.  I celebrate alone.

March 5, 2010: I sit here a few days later, still pretty excited. I have watched “THE goal” multiple times and I still can’t believe that it happened. I still can’t believe it.

This is a story that can’t be any better for Canadians, the best player of our generation scores the biggest goal of our generation.  To make it better, it was in Canada.  To make it even better than that, it gave us our 14th Gold Medal, which is the most that any country has ever won at the Winter Olympics.

But as my exuberance has started to fade, it’s been replaced by something else. Loneliness. The truth is, shortly after that goal, I have never been more homesick in all of my life. After all 80% of the people in Canada watched the gold medal game, and me, one of the most devout hockey fans that I know, was not one of them.

What would the 19 year old Glen say to me now?  How could I do that?  How could I not be where the action is?

Living abroad has been a challenge, I have missed births, deaths, weddings, and funerals, and of course those are all challenging, but this was somehow different.  Those were all personal experiences, things that I was missing out of my life.   This time though, I am missing the most collective experience that Canada has ever had, and it’s hard. This was something that was a part of everyone’s life.

Every Canadian I know will forever have a story of the place they were when Crosby scored THE goal. For me though, I wasn’t the one place that I needed to be. I wasn’t home.

Today my guest is fellow Laowai blogger  Ericka. She is currently living in Qingdao, and writes a great deal about jade, learning Chinese, and being attracted to Bruce Lee. Today, we’re going to talk about Valentine’s Day, the New Year, and the Winter Olympics.

So join us for Fact or Fiction 3:  My Laowai Valentine!

1. In the coming years we will see as many Laowai women date Chinese men as we see Chinese women date Laowai men.

Glen: FICTION

I think that we will see more foreign women with Chinese men than we do currently, but I just don’t think that it’ll even out anytime soon. There are far too many “White Diggers” among the locals. There are plenty of men out there longing to be big shots and plenty of women out there who want that level of comfort and security. I think that as long as the economic imbalance stays what it is, and so long as my gender stays as shallow as it is, things will remain the same for the near future.

Ericka: FICTION

Many – No. More – Yes. The idea of mail-order husbands will probably never catch on, and so the foreign women will never catch up with the numbers of foreign men with Chinese counterparts. As China modernizes and more foreign women come to China, more laowai women will date and maybe marry Chinese men. This will not happen over night so we can’t expect to see many foreign women with Chinese men in the next few years.

In the spirit of the Romantic Days, the man and woman agree! 1 for 1.

2. Western men in general take advantage of local women.

Glen: FACT

I know that there are plenty of very normal, healthy relationships between locals and foreigners, but I think that is far from the norm. All the time I see old men with very young local women, I see beautiful Chinese women hanging out with men who would be losers back home, I see Western men try to make their Chinese significant others feel stupid, and I see Chinese women literally prostituting themselves out. What makes this worse is it makes all of the healthy relationships that exist get questioned.

Ericka: FACT

Unfortunately, I think many foreign men take advantage of the cultural dating differences. In China, there isn’t much casual dating (at least not between two young people) – if two people date, they expect they are working towards marriage, and sometimes these western men lead the girls on with no thought of marriage. Or they don’t bother to inform their girlfriends that they are not rich and/or will not take them to their home country. This whole situation is made worse by the fact that Chinese girls are not allowed to date in high school, making Chinese college girls, in general, much more naive or innocent than western girls of the same age. There is a definite taking advantage of. Though there are also plenty of decent western men out there too.

2 for 2!  How sweet…

3. China is a romantic place.

Glen: FACT

Absolutely! With all of the red lanterns, foggy mountains, great outdoor scenery, fireworks, and great temples, this is a land of romance. Heck, even the crowded streets and confusion has it’s “Gazes across the room” type charm.

Ericka: FICTION

In a country where outward displays of affection are not encouraged, romantic is not an adjective I would use to describe China. PDAs seem to be more a form of rebellion or excitement then actual romance, and “I love you” (520) isn’t traditionally proclaimed like in the west. In fact, people complained my husband and I were too affectionate on our wedding day and it made the guests feel uncomfortable. There are (traditionally) no romantic wedding proposals and honeymoons either don’t exist or are very structured and impersonal. When a romantic evening is dinner at Pizza Hut, there is not much romance to be had.

There are of course places like Yunnan, Sichuan, or Hangzhou where it is so majestic and beautiful you just expect someone to pop out reciting Tang poetry and mistrals playing erhu singing “wo ai ni you duo shen.” You can make your own romance there.

Our first spat of the day.  2 for 3. Time to switch the order

4. The biggest story in China from the Year of the Ox was the Xinjiang Riots.

Ericka: FACT

Though riots are not unknown in the Xinjiang area, the riots of 2009 where particularly attention grabbing. I would say that swine flu came as a close #2, with the quarantine of foreigners and closing of schools, but it wasn’t a story that came directly out of China.

Glen: FACT

It’s certainly not the story that the PRC wanted to have dominate the world headlines, but them’s the breaks sometimes.  The effects of those riots is still being felt with heavy censorship both in Xinjiang and around China.  I don’t imagine that changing anytime soon.

3 for 4.  Not so bad.

5. The biggest story for the Year of the Tiger will be the Shanghai Expo.

Ericka: FICTION

While the Shanghai Expo is a big deal, the biggest story of the year shouldn’t be foreseeable. China is always interesting and full of surprises (good and bad), and I’m sure that they won’t let us down in the Year of the Tiger. Something unforeseeable will happen with serious shock value.

Glen: FACT

Hmmm you’re probably right with “something unforeseeable” happening, but I’ll take the safe bet here.  The Shanghai Expo is the second phase of China’s Big Three attempts to open up (along with the Beijing Olympics, and the Guangzhou Asian Games) and for a country that had to lose several wars to even allow Europeans to trade here, it’s a big deal.  The Expo may be trumped by something else, but I think that the effects of the Expo, and the philosophy that goes along with it, will have a huge effect on this country for a long time.

Another disagreement.  3 for 5.  Will they top .500?

6. After China’s success in the 2008 Olympics, they are on their way to being a winter sports power.

Ericka: FICTION

The Winter Olympics just don’t have the same prestige or international attention as the Summer Olympics, and so I don’t think that the Chinese government will invest the time and money into developing winter sport athletes. It could happen, but I just don’t see it in the near future.

Glen: FACT

Unless you are from Canada or Norway it seems like the Winter Olympics will always be the second place compared to their warmer, more international counterparts (note:  I’m Canadian so I LOVE them).  But it seems like China really wants to have a strong athletics program.  So far in these games, they have won 5 Gold medals.  In all previous winter games, they only won 4 gold medals total (2 in 2002, 2 in 2006).  So it seems like they are improving a great deal.  The government dumped a bunch of money and effort into their sports programs, and I think that we will see the Chinese topping the medals tables in the not too distant future.  So long as they don’t win at curling or ice hockey, I’m fine with that.

And that concludes it. 3 for 6.  The most harmonious edition of FoF yet!

As always, what do you think?

Here’s a great video recorded at TED2010 earlier this month in which TED curator Chris Anderson talks to Google co-founder Sergey Brin about the company’s recent statements about their China operations. You can read the whole transcript of the talk here.

Apologies for the far right-side of the video being cut off. It shouldn’t affect functionality of the embedded video and is only a minor amount of the actual video. Also, the video plays well in full-screen.

I suppose had I arrived in China a little later in life, I’d have known how to cook. Over the years the friends with whom I used to scarf burritos and pizzas during our university days gradually learned how to prepare their own meals. They had little choice; in the West, young people with meager salaries simply cannot afford to eat in restaurants all the time.

But in China, eating in restaurants is one of life’s great pleasures.  From the beginning I embraced the wonderful Chinese concept of 热闹: hot and noisy. I’d gather a group of friends, order way too much food, and enjoy a raucous meal for a mere fraction of the amount it would cost back at home. And when you’re done, you’re done. No dishes!

I admit this is a strange way to begin an essay about why I now like to cook. I think, however, that my experience described above might resonate with some of you who, like me, enjoyed a mid-20s period of adolescence as laowai in China.

As you might have guessed, I now cook. I cook even though it probably doesn’t save me a lot of money, even though my repertoire of dishes isn’t terribly impressive, even though I could certainly spend my free time doing other things I like. I cook even though I live in a neighborhood where there are literally dozens of cheap and cheerful dining options.

So in homage to a neat little essay I stumbled upon this morning, I now present why I cook:

• I cook because I derive an almost primeval pleasure in controlling fire
• I cook because I like to know exactly what I’m eating- a lifetime of eating processed foods, America’s unfortunate contribution to global cuisine, has instilled me with a desire to eat simple, natural foods.
• I cook because as I approach 30, being able to provide for myself- and perhaps someday for others- has become a greater priority.
• I cook because sometimes I can cook for others, and seeing their enjoyment of my culinary creation is a real pleasure
• I cook because I’m not one of those people who can just eat anything and not gain weight. To the contrary, if I don’t watch what I eat I can fatten up real fast.
• I cook because I was raised by two good cooks and feel that the ability to do so is part of my lineage.
• I cook because I love food. And wine.
• I cook because I even like doing the dishes now. Funny, huh?

What about you? Why do you (or don’t you) cook? Perhaps a lost-laowai recipe thread might be the offing, no?

photo by massdistraction.

My apologies in advance for my ignorance, with one exception all of the songs are in English, and I also haven’t found a good Chinese band to comfortably consider “mine” enough yet to include on anything so personal.  Nonetheless though, today I add 20 more songs to share/discuss with the Anglo-Sino-Blogosphere.  It includes:  Feist, Franz Ferdinand, Iceland’s finest, a Bob Dylan cover, Simon and Garfunkel, and a Beatles/Jay-Z mashup.  Really, how many more playlists can claim that kind of a lineup?

He loves his music, do you? by shankar_shiv

Track #1: Joel Plaskett – Nowhere With You: Before we get going, I’d like to apologize for all of the Canadian-Content on this list.  It was rather inadvertent, but what can I say, my country makes great music.  This song in particular is very Canadian-centric, with lots of references to Halifax, Nova Scotia.  That being said, this is still the perfect song to start out any journey.   Whether it’s across the planet or down the street.  Even if you don’t know what on earth a Tatamagouche is.  It’s just so full of energy and fully encapsulates the travelers mindset and the “na na na” part is full of joy.

Most China-tastic Line: “You got nowhere that you’re going to.  Can I go nowhere with you?”

Track #2: Arcade Fire – Neighbourhood #2 (Laika): Let’s face it, moving to the other side of the world from your family and friends is a little strange.  This song chronicles these kids talking about their brother who went away and from his family trying to escape himself.  They love and want him to come back, even though maybe he doesn’t fit there.  Sound familiar?

Most China-tastic Line: “Our older brother set off for, a great adventure…”

Track #3: The Rural Alberta Advantage – Don’t Haunt This Place: One of the reasons that many of us move away is to escape from something back home.  Often times, your past catches up to you, no matter how much you want it to not haunt this place.  Sometimes though, there is no escape.

…alright that may not apply to much to some of you out there, but it’s still a darn good song, give it a listen!

Most China-tastic Line: “Don’t haunt this heart, don’t haunt this place”

Track #4: Broken Social Scene - Pacific Theme: The first time I saw the Pacific Ocean was from a plane en route to Beijing.  That may not be the same for all of you, but this song always makes me think of the moment that I looked out the window and the land ended below me.  It’s still a great, quirky, song that just sounds right walking down Chinese streets.

Most China-tastic Line: [Instrumental...so...all of it!]

Track #5: Tegan & Sara – Our Trees: One of the first things that people notice in China is the pollution.  Even the most ardent defenders of this country can’t really stick up for that one with anything more than “It’s worse in other parts of the country”.  This is a great and haunting song about all those missing trees and our missing air supply.

Most China-tastic Line: “If the trees could be lions would they still fall and be tagged? Would they refuse to surrender, refuse to be gagged? If the trees had a mother and a father like mine, Would they stand up say praise the trees the trees will be fine ”

Track #6: Goldfinger - Is She Really Going Out With Him?: Probably the next thing after the pollution that is easy to notice is all of the crazy couplings of locals and laowais.  This has been covered all over the place along the blogosphere and I don’t have much to add to it to be honest.  While there are multiple healthy couples out there, there are certainly several that are not.

Most China-tastic Line: “There’s something going wrong around here”

Track #7:  DJ Dangermouse – Allure: Living abroad is a rather intoxicating thing.  Sometimes it doesn’t really make sense, but there is a certain allure to it.  Also, it’s hard not to feel like a bit of a big shot with all of your friends being excited in everything you have to say, and countless locals telling you how great your Chinese is (hint:  it probably isn’t), and everything being so cheap and easy to live large.  What better way to celebrate that than a song originally by the Jigga man himself?  I chose this infamous version by DJ Dangermouse from The Grey Album, featuring a sampling of “Dear Prudence” because nothing in China is real or legal, so why should every song on the playlist be?

Most China-tastic Line: “It’s intoxicatin man, y’all don’t know why you do what you do”

Track #8: Stars – Soft Revolution: Do you remember all the “#GFW” tweets that went out back in June and July?  Do you remember what that accomplished at all?  Do you remember any of the angry blog posts that were written about sixfour, the riots, the Three Gorges Damn, Google, or anything in Tibet?  There are all sorts of problems that we witness here in China, and some laowais try to protest, but nothing really happens in the end.  Lord knows I’m guilty of it, but it’s the sad truth.  We’re fighting a soft revolution here.

Most China-tastic Line: “And after changing everything, they couldn’t tell, we couldn’t sing.”

Track #9: Neutral Milk Hotel - Communist Daughter: (sorry, the video is really strange and irrelevant, but it was the best that I could find) After dealing with the pollution, the prostitution, the ghetto fabulous lifestyle and the restrictions that we face, it’s easy to lose sight of something, the people.  This song is here to remind us of them.

Most China-tastic Line: “Sweet communist, the communist daughter, standing on the seaweed water”

Track #10: Sigur Rós - Untitled #4: First a little context.  This song, and the whole ( ) album was sung in Hopelandic,  a made up language by the band’s lead singer.  At first it sounds strange and terrifying, but once you give it some tim and look to the beauty of what is being said and not the actual words, you’ll be genuinely touched.  Sounds pretty familar, does it not?

Most China-tastic Line: In the CD jacket, they left the whole lyrics section blank so that listeners could put in their own meanings.  Try it for yourself.

Track #11: M. Ward – Chinese Translation: A strange circular song to go for a strange, circular country.  This song doesn’t have a ton to do with the title, other than its loopy nature (much like translations).  It is all about someone searching for answers and only getting more questions, not unlike a lot of our journeys.

Most China-tastic Line: “I planned an escape, just like you”

Track #12: Eels – It’s a Beautiful Day: The perfect song to accept things, even when they get a little strange and discouraging.  For the zillionth time, sounds familiar right?

Most China-tastic Line: “Goddamn right, it’s a beautiful day”

Track #13: Wilco - Pot Kettle Black: This is a great song for when you’re getting sick of any of the hypocrite laowai’s you may know (or read on the internet).  They are all over the place, it’s impossible to find people who don’t do so many of the things that they complain that the Chinese are doing, or the many things that they complain about all the other foreigners doing, or…

Most China-tastic Line: “It’s become so obvious, you’ve become so oblivious to yourself”

Track #14: Yeah Yeah Yeahs – Turn Into: Apparently, we’re not allowed to become Chinese.  Doesn’t mean that we can’t hope to some day!  There’s lots to admire about the Chinese people and culture.  Hopefully at some point or another all of us will make an attempt to become a bit more Chinese at some point or another.

Most China-tastic Line: “Hope I do, turn into you”

Track #15: Franz Ferdinand – Come On Home: Eventually someone wants you to come home.  Maybe it’s your parents, siblings, friends, or even yourself.  Sometime the urge is there, and it’s a hard, hard thing to fight.

Most China-tastic Line: “Let’s not forget, we were so strong, so bloody strong.  Come on home…”

Track #16: LCD Soundsystem – All My Friends: If you are only going to click on one link, please for your own benefit make it this one.  It is a perfect song to describe any loneliness, insecurity, and uncertainty that goes along with modern life, especially on the far side of the planet from where you may or may not belong.  This song was ever so close to making it to my last playlist, but I decided to go with a different song by the same artist instead.  I have blogged about this exact song before, saying:

“…this song just didn’t quite connect with me the way it was with other people in 2007.

When I first heard this I was confident (probably a little bit too confident) and I knew exactly where all my friends where.  So the message of this song just didn’t quite connect to me immediately.

But now, after having my bravado shaken, and moving halfway around the world.  This song rings loud and clear with me.

Because it helps me ask a question that I’m probably too scared to ask on my own:  where are my friends?”

Couldn’t have said it better myself!  Errr…wait a minute…

Most China-tastic Line: “Yeah, I know it gets tired only where are your friends tonight?”

Track #17: Feist – It’s Cool To Love Your Family: A very sweet song, by a very sweet songstress.  We all love to be independent, but sometimes you’ve got to give in to your desire to be back home.

Most China-tastic Line: “It’s cool it’s cool to love your family, I know because I love them more and more

Track #18: Sufjan Stevens – No Man’s Land: When I first back-packed around China in 2007, my friend and travel-buddy Steve said something incredibly intelligent.  I said how much I hate the long days on the plane/train/bus and he told me how much he loves it because he gets to be “nowhere in particular”.  This song is here to celebrate the uncertain location that you get in between points A and B.

Most China-tastic Line: “This land is yours, this land is mine”

Track #19: Simon and Garfunkel – Homeward Bound: Easily the most well known song on this list.  It’s a great song to have when you’re on your way back home or you want to be.

Most China-tastic Line: “I wish I were, homeward bound.”

Track #20: Antony with Bryce Dessner – I Was Young When I Left Home: It’s not often that people can cover someone as great as Bob Dylan, but damnit these two did it.  This beautiful song is one of the many, many highlights of one of hte best albums of 2009, Dark Was the Night.  It captures the learning that goes on when you’re on the other side of the planet, and it touches on just how easy it is to lose touch with the people that matter the most to you.

Most China-tastic Line: “I was young when i left home, and I been out a-ramblin’ round, and I never wrote a letter to my home”

So there’s my list, what’s yours?

I know I am by no means an expert regarding China.  But I guess it’s easy to get complacent as a resident (even a temporary one) of the country.  Sure, I’d been overcharged for taxis before.  I’d even had to walk several blocks from major transportation hubs to find a taxi driver that would use the meter.  But I’d never been taken by the “one price at the start, a different price at the end” scam.  I felt ashamed, angry, disappointed, sad, and betrayed.  I had even chatted for a few minutes in Chinese with the driver while we were on the trip.  To get screwed as if I was some laowai tourist on holiday was like a stab in the back.

Of course, that’s exactly what I was: a laowai tourist on holiday with her laowai family.  And for the first time in several months, I realized that I didn’t have so much of a grasp on this country as I thought I had.  It wasn’t just the tuk-tuk driver who gave me that impression, obviously.  Many things that I had control over only days earlier seemed to slip out of my grasp as soon as my parents and brother arrived.

Our soft sleeper train tickets to Harbin, booked well in advance through a travel agency by my mother, turned out to be in different cars.  We had unwisely planned to leave Beijing for Harbin the same night they arrived – leaving no time to adjust to the culture shock that hit my family full-force.

My brother is 5′10″, pasty white, has red hair and a red beard, and has gauged (slightly stretched) ear piercings.  Not even a typical laowai by Beijing standards.  None of us was prepared for the staring and the subsequent discomfort it caused all members of my family.  Then came the different-car tickets (thankfully, two were in the same car and bunk, so we put my brother and mom together in there).  Then came the shouts of, “Hello!”  “Lookie!” and “Tour guide, tour guide!” that I had become accustomed to ignoring, but that they (understandably) had not.

We soldiered on to Harbin, and good thing.  Once my brother fell asleep on the train, all stress was forgotten.  A good night’s sleep in a soft sleeper bunk on those fabulous Beijing-Harbin trains can chase away any worries.  I’m just thankful we didn’t try hard sleeper at all during the trip.

The rest of the trip had its speed bumps: we were unable to get a taxi (or a pair of taxis) on our return to Beijing, even at the “official” train station waiting line; our travel agent couldn’t get us tickets from Beijing to Huang Shan, so we had to skip that part of the trip entirely and found ourselves on a 10-hour delayed flight to Nanjing.  We found ourselves becoming increasingly flexible as the trip went on, and we ended up having a great time.  But for a few minutes there, I thought China was going to be a lost cause to my family forever.

A before and after photo of a JAR rescued pup

During a conversation about the treatment of animals in China some time ago, I remember a friend saying, “what rights are animals going to have in a country that is still working out the rights of humans?” Anyone that’s ever been to a zoo in China knows just how true this is.

Fortunately, like all things in China, this is changing. Helping along that change in Shanghai is an altruistic group of volunteer animal rescuers called Jaiya’s Animal Rescue, or JAR for short. The nearly year-old organization was started by a woman named Julia and her husband Marvin, who was kind enough to answer some questions for this post.

Lost Laowai: Can you tell us a bit about why you started this organization? Who is Jaiya?

Marvin: My wife and I have always saved animals here in China wherever we were (different provinces). It was last year March 2009 that we both came up with the name in loving memory of our daughter ‘Jaiya Kristina’ who unfortunately died of SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome) on February 14th, 2009. We named the group JAR – Jaiya’s Animal Rescue.

We want to cooperate not only with foreigners, but also with the locals. We believe that with both foreign and local members working together to save animals in need (healing and finding them permanent homes), it is a good cause to be a part of.

With the Expo nearing, we can see more and more families adopting pets. Even though there are many dedicated and loving pet owners in Shanghai; education is still very much necessary to be able to provide the training, welfare, medical, nutrition, licensing and general animal pet care information to potential new pet owners.

It is also important to emphasize to people that JAR does not have a shelter or a physical address. Due to limitations of resources, we can only do so much in saving animals off the streets of Shanghai. When people rescue an animal, we ask them to help us by taking responsibility and look after the animal temporarily until we find the animal a permanent home. Unfortunately, with the lack of resources, people and funding, in some cases we have to say ‘no’. It is difficult and we do our best to help the situation.

Jaiya surrounded by animals that have been rescued in her name.

Lost Laowai: To date JAR has adopted out more than 100 dogs and 30 cats, that must take a lot of time and commitment. What sort of help do you have? Are most volunteers expats or local Chinese?

Marvin: We rely on our local rescuers. We have approx 30-35 rescuers and it’s increasing as time goes on. We all have the animals in our homes or people who own boarding kennels kindly assist us by temporarily taking care of the animals due to ‘overflow’.

The majority of our rescuers are Chinese, however, more and more foreigners are offering support by volunteering or fostering. We have been actively involved in working with the Shanghai American School and their animal welfare program, called “Because We Care: Animal Rescue and Support Community Service Club”. It was started by teacher and JAR adopter Marney Rosen with the triple focus of educating younger students in the school, fundraising for JAR and helping out with other animal-related community ventures. We are planning to have the students come to one of our kennels and help by painting & cleaning the facility, as well as providing linen, food & pet supplies.

Lost Laowai: In your opinion, is pet abandonment a large issue in China? Why do you think such is the case?

Marvin: So far, what we have seen and in our experience, yes, pet abandonment is a large issue in China.

Animal welfare in China is not implemented the way we like compared to Europe, North America etc. We have seen so many cases where many people buy from pet stores/breeders and have no idea of how to look after the animal depending on the breed. People sometimes buy pets on impulse because the dog/cat is cute, however, they do not realize that there are responsibilities involved (medical care costs, registration for dogs etc).

Spaying & neutering animals is important to lessen the pet population. This is costly, and with donations we assist other rescuers in implementing this. There are so many stray/abandoned animals in Shanghai and with the mating season coming up we have introduced the ‘TNR Program’ (Trap, Neuter, and Release). This is a procedure where we catch ‘compound cats’ and have them neutered or spayed and released once they’re healed. Again, this all depends if we have the funding.

Up for Adoption: Calvin

Adoption Profile: Calvin

Calvin is a male dog, approximately one year old. The rescuers first saw Calvin about a month ago wandering in their compound. After catching him they immediately brought him to the vets for a medical check.

He was given a clean bill of health, and been vaccinated, deflead and neutered. He is a friendly, playful, and gentle dog. He gets along well with people and other dogs. He is a little wary, but given a few days time he will warm up to you.

He would make a great addition to a family! Learn more about Calvin here.

Lost Laowai: Before adoption, all rescued animals are vaccinated, de-wormed and de-flead — those bills must add up. How does JAR support itself?

Marvin: Some of our animals that are available for adoption may unfortunately have had bad experiences living on the streets due to being abandoned, mistreated, abused, and have been traumatized (some may have various bad habits such as chewing, not housetrained etc). With the help and care from our local rescuers, and our dog trainers, the animals have recovered and are deemed adoptable.

We urge the adopter(s) to be patient, loving and committed to these ‘abandoned’ animals. It will help them lead a new life and merge with the family eventually. The build up of trust and confidence will not only be rewarding for the dog, but also for all the family.

Having the animals vaccinated, dewormed, and deflead is the minimum. We also have to ensure the animal’s disposition (character and temperament) are friendly towards people and other animals. We mainly rely on donations from people. We don’t ask for donations directly, however we make people aware that we pay everything from our own pockets to ensure the animal’s well being is taken care of. Any amount given to JAR is appreciated.

Lost Laowai: How do you find foster people for the rescued animals? Do you host events or work with any other organizations to get the word out?

A JAR Adoption Day

Marvin: JAR tries to participate in bazaars/events in the community. We usually participate at the Christmas/Spring/Summer bazaars organized by International Schools such as Concordia, BISS, and Shanghai American School. We also participate in the local community bazaars in Seasons Villas, Vizcaya etc.

Shanghai American School also organized two “Cake Walk” fundraisers for JAR. Donations raised will go towards medical fees, transportation, boarding, desexing of animals.

We have not yet implemented or hosted an event ourselves yet. We are planning to do this once we have a location and an establishment willing to have us host our events. We are also seeking a place to hold our monthly adoption days, as we would like to hold the adoption days in Puxi & Pudong.

Currently, we post information about JAR in forums, “free” website classifieds, recommendations from existing adopters, friends and associates. The best thing so far that has worked out really well is by word of mouth. We emphasize that we are always in need of foster parents to support us due to the overwhelming amount of animals we have in our care.

Lost Laowai: Can anyone adopt an animal, or is there some sort of screening process? How do you prepare the prospective new pet owners for taking care of their new pet?

Marvin: Having a pet takes time, responsibility, compassion, patience and education. Prospective/existing families should able and be willing to spend the time and money necessary to provide medical and overall proper care for the pet. Be a responsible pet owner yourself and then share your knowledge with others. Having a pet is for life.

When a query or a phone call is received, JAR submits an Adoption Information Sheet Questionnaire document to be filled in and returned. Some questions asked are: Are potential adopters willing to pay for registering the dog every year? Is the family going to bring the animal with them when moving to another city, province, or country? Who is going to look after the animal during the day if they are out working? Are they experienced in having pets? Does the tenancy agreement allow pets in the home?

Lost Laowai: How important is the role of the foster families in the running of the organization?

Marvin: We always need more foster parents. It is a great way to have a “temporary” pet here in Shanghai if you cannot adopt, miss your own pet from home or if you want to have a furry companion in general. You get a companion and help save an animal at the same time! We would like to have foster parents for emergency cases (1-2 days) or long-term, depending on the situation, be it to foster dogs, cats, kittens, or puppies.

We are grateful to these people because it takes so much dedication, time and love. When you see a five-day old kitten or puppy survive because of our foster parents, it is a wonderful feeling of accomplishment!

We also need special care foster parents who are willing to take in our sick animals. It would be ideal to have foster parents available during the holidays as sometimes our own foster parents or adopters go on holidays too (summer holidays, the October and May holidays, Christmas and Chinese New Year).

Some JAR Tips on Animal Care and Ownership in China

• It is mandatory to have dogs licensed. It is the law and it is responsible pet ownership.
• Ensure the animal get its yearly check-up and vaccinations.
• Do not leave your animal outside in the winter not unless it’s a dog with thick fur and don’t mind the cold weather, or leaving the animal basking in the heat during the summer.
• Refrain from purchasing purebreds from breeders. Adopting a mixed dog is just as good. JAR and other rescue groups have so many strays that need loving homes. Why buy animals when there are so many available for adoption or out on the streets that deserve love too?
• Find and use a reputable veterinarian. Many unlicensed doctors call themselves vets use fake or expired medicines and do not provide real, professional medical care. If you are unsure, ask your circle of friends, and colleagues or those who have pets.
• Some animals that has been bought from pet stores or breeders are sick or pumped with antibiotics to make them look healthy when they are sold but die soon after. We urge people not to go that route, as it is inhumane. Why not just adopt a rescued animal from JAR or rescue an animal you find and give them a loving home instead?
• Do not allow people be cruel to animals. It is all about education. Coming across situations like this, we would stop, try to explain animal kindness and most likely try to take the animal ourselves if someone continued to hit or abuse an animal.

For people who wish to volunteer, foster, donate or adopt an animal; please use the following information:

JAR – Jaiya’s Animal Rescue
Contact: Marvin & Julia
Web site: www.jarshanghai.org
Email: click to show this e-mail
“…every animal deserves a safe, secure & loving home…”

Liuzhou, China over one 24 hour period: 08:01:25 PM

Michael Steverson, better known as “Expatriate Games” in the blogsphere and on Flickr, has put together an awesome project entitled “Xin Nian Hao – 24 Hours in Liuzhou“. The series of photos and accompanying stories chronicle an entire day (one photo an hour) over CNYE and into the early morning hours of the first day of the new lunar year.

The 4:35:19 AM shot was my favourite for the story that followed the shutter. Hilarious.

If you’re in China and without a good VPN, try this link.

I suppose I’ve not been here long enough yet to truly understand what that holiday feeling is, certainly not to the extent my wife and her compatriots do. Being home for the Christmas season this past December, I saw this in reverse. My wife likes Christmas; she liked the food, the gifts and the family visits (mostly the first two). But I don’t think she can really understand that “Christmas feeling” like those who have grown up in the culture do. That feeling, even at my rather ripe age and lack of religious penchants, that something magical happens between Christmas Eve and Christmas Morning.

But even with the limits of cultural comprehension; by comparison, I think we can all get the significance of what this season brings. That warm feeling of family, a great connect that spans generations. For the young, a chance to get a bit of cash and some new clothes; for the old, an opportunity to look back and see how life and family has changed over the years.

What I’ve realized getting older is that there is a bit of a torch passed from generation to generation when it comes to holidays. When I was a child, Christmas dinner was usually at my grandparents’ house. As I got older this moved to my parents’ house, and the branches of the family tree slid up a notch. One day soon it will be held at mine or my sisters’ homes.

It is much the same in Chinese culture, with extended family all returning to their common patriarchical point at this time of year. Thinking about this the other day it occurred to me that this dynamic, which has surely been around for centuries in China (if not longer) is in transition to a unique period of Chinese history that may change the way in which holidays are celebrated here — namely, a very narrow family tree and much smaller family gatherings.

Looking at a common scenario now, you might head to a father’s parents’ house for dinner. He could have several siblings, making for a rather full house, particularly with the inclusion of the current generation’s kids. But when the grandparents die, the line gets shifted up, and you have the father’s son, who is married and has only one child. They’re now the only ones that come and visit for the holiday. Maybe aunts and uncles drop by with cousins.

Now looking on further still, we have a generation that has no brothers or sisters, and their children with no brothers and sisters and no cousins. Suddenly those holidays that a generation ago were a family reunion of sorts, have become just a visit to grandma and grandpa’s, or possibly just with the regular family you see every day.

It hit me that the one child policy has done more than restrict population growth and create stressful complications with the care for the elderly. It has also completely altered the family dynamic and how that relates to the celebration of traditional holidays.

I can’t help but think that there is a benefit to that family connection, a sense that we come from something much wider and deeper than just our immediate family. I’m fortunate that my soon-to-be born child, despite not having any Chinese aunts and uncles, will gain this from my side. However, he will be the exception among his Chinese friends. It’s hard not to feel that the whole thing is just a bit… lonely.