In fact I said “What makes this worse is it makes all of the healthy relationships that exist get questioned.” and Ericka said “…there are also plenty of decent western men out there…”. So if you are in a health relationship and a decent Western Man, then why the need to get so defensive?

Our generalization was no more ignorant than you claiming that foreign women are “obnoxious and trite” or masculine.

@Tina: Good point about Chinese women taking advantage of the money! That could be a good idea for a future topic on Fact or Fiction.

@Matt: Thanks for the comment on this feature. Care to be a guest sometime soon?

Let me comment as both a “loser” and a “Western man”. Perhaps my “out of my league” wife loves me because I’m kind and loving. Or because I don’t smack her around. Or because I don’t drink, smoke and spend my free time in KTVs. Or maybe I find Chinese women feminine and graceful, but find foreign woman rude, obnoxious and trite.

It’s rather ignorant that this article implies that a foreign man is with a Chinese woman because:

1. He’s a loser, but is “exotic” in China.
2. He has lots of money and the poor Chinese girl wants a better life.
3. She wants to move overseas.

It couldn’t possibly be because so many foreign woman confuse gender equality with masculinity or that their expectations in a relationship are often unrealistic.

That being said, I agree with Tina that simply stating that foreign men take advantage of local women isn’t a very accurate depiction of the true situation.

Granted, there are certainly men who take advantage of local women, just as there are men who take advantage of women everywhere. And as Tina points out, there are local women who most certainly take advantage of laowai men.

There are in fact a lot of loser Western men, of all ages, dating women seemingly out of their league. Western men are still exotic species in much of China- and exoticism is a draw for more daring Chinese women. Furthermore the absolute income and earning potential of a Western guy is far higher than his Chinese counterpart for geo-political reasons. It’s also important to realize that there are still quite a few Chinese willing to marry a foreigner for the content of his passport.

These situations make it easier for the average Western guy to meet someone in China. Could you blame them for taking advantage of it? Meeting someone suitable isn’t easy, especially at a certain age. So while I don’t condone the boorish behavior certain men exhibit I don’t think such a blanket statement is necessarily fair.

And Ericka- China isn’t romantic? Come on! It may not be Italy or Brazil but there’s a lot of romance happening, trust me

I’ve seen very aggressive Chinese women pick up married men, while their wives were standing right there, and thinking nothing of it.

I know not just one but a few stories of Chinese women once married and have a child, they take the kid to the U.S or Canada so the child will have a better education and in one case leave the Western man back in China. Chinese are more practical when it comes to marriage. We’ve been told (true or not) that Chinese marry their friends not the ones they love. Then everyone goes out and has affairs. Again, not everyone but a good portion, as we have heard this not just from Laowais, but many Chinese themselves.

In speaking with another Chinese, it could be the area we were in, since we lived in Xiamen, and was open but he commented on how aggressive the Xiamen women were trying to catch a Laowai.

Will it change of course, but for now I think it’s fairly even when it comes to people taking advantage of each other.